Is love possible on Facebook?

WAYS TO CONNECT
Facebook is a place to connect but is it a place for love?
Facebook can certainly be a starting point; obviously it can’t be the ending point for love such as marital love. Also is it true or real love – is it sustainable and lasting love?
Could Facebook be a good starting point for marital love?  
If we look at Western love – starting on Facebook cannot be worse than meeting in a bar or club. Numerous Western marriages start in bars, clubs and discos. 

BAR LOVE
I have a brother who met his wife in a bar – their marriage did last for over 20 years but ended in divorce. I am not sure of the exact reasons but it may have been in part because she could not give him children. My own parents met in a work situation – my Mum and Dad worked in the same company when they met. My parents’ marriage lasted for less than 20 years because my father passed away. My grandmother met her husband on holiday on the Isle of Man. Hers lasted for over 30 years before my grandfather passed away.

WESTERN MARITAL LOVEThus in the West, there has to be a starting point so Facebook could be a good place to get introduced. It is a meeting of minds point so why not – it could be the start of something great especially if you have common interests and are on Facebook to enhance those particular interests.
FACEBOOK REVELATIONS
If you watch a person’s postings and comments over a period of time you certainly get to know their personality, character, their associates and what makes them tick.  In Western culture, you need to know a person’s character and that certainly is possible on Facebook – certainly glimpses of them.  

FACEBOOK LOVE
Also what do you want to do with that love? Take it into the real world? - it may not be transferable love. The reality of physical love is that wherever you meet – it might not be transferable love.

THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE - IS YOUR LOVE TRANSFERABLE? 
This is the most challenging aspect of physical and romantic love. The ability to transfer love to other situations, such as living together, is by no means easy, guaranteed or lasting. Whether it is true or real love - whether it is sustainable and lasting love - these are questions that we all have whatever the meeting or starting point. Sustaining love is the one of the greatest challenges of the 21st century.

THE DEFINITION OF LOVE
We have to think of the meaning or definition of love. If by love - you mean the brotherhood of man, then that type of love is possible on Facebook but if you are talking about romantic love then I think you have to be very careful. Also where does romantic love lead to - romantic love has to lead to something and that can't be fulfilled on Facebook. Romance involves some form of physical love. The best place for that is in a long-term real-world relationship and in my opinion marriage if you are fortunate enough to meet a suitable person to marry.

MUSLIM MARITAL LOVE
In the Muslim world, romantic love is to be within marriage. Thus if you believe in the Muslim way then no Facebook is not the place to start romantic love. It starts upon marriage. The Muslim way is love develops in marriage. Love should deepen in marriage.

WHAT IS MY PERSONAL STAND? People meet so Facebook can be the start – and we can love at a pure holy level – that love is certainly possible on Facebook.  My greatest concern with romantic love wherever it starts is whether it can last. If you have that lasting variety then you are very blessed. Sadly the divorce courts tell another story of the sustainability of marital love.
The greatest question in the 21st century and throughout the ages – is it true or real love? Is it sustainable and lasting love?

Friends and friendship – here’s how to have closer relations. 10 ways

10 WAYS TO EXPERIENCE A MORE FRIENDLY LIFE

1. UNDERSTAND THE VALUE OF FRIENDSHIP – understand this core value and central core of existence. 

Our life is our fortune and our friends are our fortune.  Thus if we lose our friends it is unfortunate. Hazrat Ali R.A. is reputed to have said: “Unfortunate is he who cannot gain a few sincere friends during his life and more unfortunately is the one has gained them and then lost them (through his deeds).”

2. WORK OUT WHO YOUR TRUE FRIENDS ARE
It is often difficult to work out who are our true friends. Sometimes a person who loses his temper with you may be the truest of friends and may have your best intentions at heart.  Although sadly the delivery of the message was inappropriate.

3. NO TRUE FRIEND IS EVER LOST
Sadly, it is only after we have lost a friend that we realize that they had our best interests at heart and were true friends. Once we realize this – make contact and tell  your friend this. If they are true friends they will appreciate the gesture and resume the friendship.

4.  IMPROVE YOUR POWERS OF DISCERNMENT
When thinking of true care and true feelings – I always think of Shakespeare’s King Lear. King Lear did not recognize his true friend because she did not clothe her words with flattery. He failed to recognize the insincere flattery. Discernment is your ability to recognize sincere-ness (genuineness) from insincerity.  Sadly so many humans get it wrong! Again once you realize you are wrong – make amends and get back on track.

5. IN-BUILT FRIENDS
Family are your first friends and for those with big families are a community. In England, adult relations between family is usually based on friendship - we will only keep regular family contact as adults if we are friends or if we have a parent who makes an effort to keep all together. In Asia we talk more about family ties and family honour and religion teaches us to treat people as well and as closely as brothers. Thus close family relations is the closest form of friendship.

6. FRIENDLY BROTHERHOOD
Religion teaches the brotherhood of man – a friendly loving relationship between others even though we don’t have blood ties. Thus it should be our aim and purpose in life to develop this level of being cordial.

7. UP YOUR VALUES
Values are the key to us and our relationships (which are forms of friendship). Develop good values and associate with those people. In friendship, you can either grow together or grow apart. Sharing a common purpose in life will increase the chance that you will grow together. Sharing a wholesome common purpose is consistent with religious principles be that Christian or Muslim.

8. FOLLOW THE CALL OF GOD
Allah gave us the perfect way to stay in friendly relations with others – it starts with Assalam o Alaikum and Allah gives us the greatest common purpose.

9. THE POWER OF ASSALAM O ALAIKUM
Assalam o Alaikum dear brothers and sisters today. Assalam o Alaikum is the perfect beginning and ending until next time – Assalam o Alaikum. Assalam o Alaikum gives us the greatest start and the greatest ending.

10. THE POWER OF GOOD DAY
Traditionally in English culture – we would say Good Day, which is also a blessing for others, and Good Bye - these are blessings of goodness wishing that God is with you and that only Good will happen. Let us live in holy values.

FRIENDLY RELATIONS 
Good Day can be a greeting and a farewell, just like Assalam o Alaikum. Thus if you are speaking in English a wonderful way to be in friendly relations, and add blessings to the world is to say Assalam o Alaikum Good Day and then end with Assalam o Alaikum, Good Day and blessings. If you know they are receptive – add God Bless or God Bless you. Let the beauty of friendship and holiness come from our mouths, words and thoughts.

Let the beauty of friendship and holiness
come from our mouths, words and thoughts.
Let's all be friends.